DEPRESSED~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

dear bloggy,

help me plsssssssss, i just cant bear with all these burden and complications in my life anymore, and i know sooo deep in my heart that im going to burst anytime.....all these 'things' just comes swiftly with unexpected moment in time, all these were way tooo instant for me.

And look at me, im just a small lil' sweet heart of urs and am learning to grow up bit by bit in a normal way so that i could cope with all the surroundings, new environment, atmosphere, new world of course'.

I just wanted to live and lead to a more family-oriented culture because i never have had a normal life BEFORE, and its soooooooooooooo freaking wrong for a child plus, the unfairness which bang towards me, am i losing something from all of the kids out there, can someone and anyone just preach me a thing or two in adapting the 'human being' life and culture??????? @.@

I've alrdy tried all my best and put the best effort for my future, moreover i've sacrificed LOADS for both of the people in this planet, so is this u're paying me back and is this what i get at the end??????? And, am i suppose to get back all the sweet and the best things from the rest of the mortal, and do i not deserve all the good things in my life after all that i've done for the both of us which just to make and create a better future for the both of us and also for the kids generation next time???? DID i done anything or something wrong in between and during these years????

Teach me, Guide me, Flow with me, Dance with me, Coach me, Instruct me, Take me to the better place, Train me, Educate me & etc etc etc etc............

I can 101% assure you that im not on my way or anytime soon giving up all i have done during these few years back however, im going to be improve it and give it the best of all i can do, plus to make sure that both of us can seriously see, feel and sense MY affection towards our future.

As you always know that im always beside you when u teared and laughed, i will never ever in my life to turn my back on you but to face to face with you and CARRY all the 'things' together and move forward to a better future. im hoping that all these will come true one day and seriously hope that someday u'll see what am i trying to do for both of the mortals here. Im working very hard for it, but DO U????????????? And of course, im not backing up or running away, as i wanna prove to every1 that knows me since im small till now.

I WILL DO IT~~~~just wait and see, i will never let myself down but to grow even higher.

I wish to have GOD's BLESS as well to help me deal with all this sufferings. and i hope GOD, U can HEAR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE................ I BEG FOR UR KIND FORGIVENESS.

Amen!!!!!!!!!

signing out bloggy, c u soon and tc

au revoir...

unemployed position

What a life for me now....every1 is telling me to_wait, be patient, sabar, tahan, yan.....

How u 1 me 2 wait wo....time flies and flies quickly too till u dont even notice it unless u're like me, sitting in front of the pc everyday, every hour and every minute....but u know what, its

meaningless with this kind of waiting-in-line's lifestyle. Im sure all of u would not love it.

What to do??? WAIT lorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Over 10 companies i have applied however, only 2 companies reply me and called for an interview.

But i still cant confirm with the company whether do i 1 2 join their team or not as i still 1 2 wait for other companies to call me to c which is the best for me and suits me well in terms of EVERYTHING. ;D

Today, i sent 3 more job-applications to the companies. Now just wait for my GOOD luck to touch me*...or else im DOOM~~~plus CNY is on its way (WORSE). No one wants me.....

no mood dy..byebye

missing me

Im lost to nowhere coz im not here or shall i say not updating any THING here!!!!! :P

Reasons: busy, assignments, final year projects, job hunting, holidaying, dating, outing, sleeping, shopping and many many more...muahahahaha...

and ya, dont forget the LAZINESS.

Facebook has also occupy ALL of my free time with their 'dull' games, viewing people's profile + photos, uploading mine too and updating my facebook details.

I think most probably will return to the blogging path sooner or later, the time is yet to be confirmed...keke...and also hv to depend on my mood as sometimes im quite a moody gal.

Anyways, tata....

Oh my...........

Hi...woah...such a long time since.......(duno when) i dint update my post here....

Reasons:
1. Bz-projects, assignments, thesis, exams...etc
2. Lazy-sleeping, TV, gaming...etc
3. Outing-family trip, shopping, dating, night tea...etc
and so on so on so on.................................

Anyway, now that im in my final year and heading to my final year's final sem...at last......................hahahhaha...really anxious and excited about it and at the same time feel stress cz of all the final year projects that i have to go thru later on at November when my final sem starts........although its only the short sem, and i know that the time will just swoot-----------but, when it comes to the hard part, u'll know........everyone needs to pass the task....

As for now, im very happy and feel loose and most of all FREEDOM.........cz i've done my FYP minor's projects, submmited my final thesis submmission for binding process.
But 1 more thing to sad is my final exam that is on the 30th of Sept and b4 my final thesis submmission......

Er.....im getting lazy to write alrdy...guess im going to stop blabbering here......
gonna surf the net now....byebye
TC....

Helloooooo~

Oh..hi...

im back....
loads to udated in here actually, but i dont have the time for this stuff PLUS, my line at home sucks, thus making me feel sick with updating the postings in here, my blog.

Well, currently im in my 2nd trimester in my final year and am doing my final year project from this sem till next(the LAST_woohoooooooo) sem untill i really graduate for good. As for now, which is the week4 in this trimester, my project will of course doing some research about my product and the benefits of it, the wekness and strength, the mission and vission and the philosophy, and dont forget about their origins and the history and...bla blablablablabla.............
So the main point here is Situation Analysis. A very thick book for my major report.

After all this typing and reading, we'll hv to do the practical stuff*the sucky yet shitty assignments*. Coz, we hv to do everything in a few weeks, and thats an extremely stressfull and *overwhelming* experience to go thru. Im not saying that i hate this but anyone and everyone wont feel the happiness journey in this. GUARANTEE!

On the other hand, as u all know that financial crisis is still on their way, so im planning to open a mini home tuition group, my target will be primary school children age 7-9. The very cute cute kids that i'll enjoy with them IF i manage to get attention from the parents about my type of home tuition.Im doing this is because to make some side income for myself and also to earn and keep some extra for my future days. Wanna be independent and become a proud girl for my mum and for my husband(next time) so that i will not be dependent on them to provide me everything which i can get it myself, coz im quite a spoilt- child since im very young!

Well, i guess im enough of writing today...got to go to meet my lecturer soon.
Catch up with u guys another time...

Cheers...........

Off very soon

Gosh...14 weeks...seems quite long but actually its very very fast...zzzp..14 weeks just in front of u without us noticing the days and the time pass soooooo quick like a super duper man...

Left 2 more days to go for me to serve in Fixgo. Im really happy for being around for this 14 weeks@3 1/2 months. Every here are really friendly, and were nice to me as a trainee here. And of course the most interesting part will be in my department with the colleagues, their such a fun people and jokers too...hahah......creative people what...sure fun and lively 1..... and the never ending deadlines from 1 week to another...a MUST to all designers, regardless of whether u're a junior to top notch creative/art director......

If u're asking me whether i miss anything here, i will definitely say the arts human here, their way too fun and kind too of course. And most of all the CD here....lenient enough to teach and guide me all the time whenever he brief me a project. I'll remember and cherish it.

Well, tomorrow i'll be having the final lunch time with my CD and the very last goodbye and another lunch with my senior and junior on the next day. So i think most probably i'll be treating them a cake. I really cant think of any better idea to cherish them with so i came out with this cake idea in my mind..hahah...ok what...stil get some good food for them, at least right....once, i thought of giving them hamper cz hamper not only for my department but also for the whole staff here, but after some thinking to myself, i think better buy a cake enough dy, as u know that im quite off the line nowadays, *sigh.....also dont know why that im always out of $$$$$$$$....or may it be my spendings??????...*sigh--------....whatever laaaa....
as long as my mum and bf can support me then im fine....kekekek...

And if any1 ask me 'r u graduating after ur internship?' the answer is NOP, as i still have to undergo 2 more sems@5 1/2 months=1 major + 2 subs.....

No worries anymore, i wont let it break me down from now on(stay the F off me u E*#@ creatures), I will definitely and 100 percently grow myself stronger to live in the assignments war till the end of the DAY......

Trust me and i wont let all of u down.....be with me to make me blossom....

xoxo

THE DIET~

Rachael is going to Keep Fit.....woohoo...long live RACHAEL~~

I even do a Diet's timetable to keep me in order so that i wont forget what must and restricted to do during the on diet time.....erm...actually i just wanna be fit + curvy + slim a bit and most of all maintain it.

So, dont get me wrong that im an ANOREXIC....but is it? am i? really not sure about it....
I stil eat as usual, its just that i just take 2 meals a day or 2+1/2 meals per day, will not be more than this and always be careful of my food intakes.....exercise more often.....worried of my kilos......always beware of the nutritional facts.....very afraid of unhealthy food such as SNACKS, SUGARS, BARS, CARBS, CHOLESTEROL, WHITE RICE + etc etc...*however, i stil consume snacks when the crave alerts me my mind, hehehe(wicked smile)*

At times im wondering maybe i am but just the very very beginning of the illness, as long as i still eat healthily and do more exercise then im fine and anorexic free.
Im not too afriad of the scales, cz the kg is not the major subject, the crucial part is the outlook's appearance. For me, when u're fat, ur kgs stil maintains and same goes to the slim ones, part of them are heavy even though they look slim.

Well, its just depends on whats inside ur body and how you love ur body....

(;

Dont worry!..Rachael is a very healthy little girl!!!

ciao...c ya later